Tag: sunrise

Sorry Rosinante, finally a warm Winter, Turkish hospitality, practicing cajon and serious music production (November 2022)

On Uludag mountain, I decided to head south towards the Mediterranean. Back in Bulgaria, the weather had started to get colder and in northern Turkey, the temperature was dropping day by day. I felt that my dream was finally coming true: for the first time in my life, I would have a warm winter!

After descending from the mountain, I made a small detour and visited the manufacturer of the Capra Camper camper cabin. Months ago, I had learned that the frame of my pickup camper, Rosinante, could potentially snap. This idea had never occurred to me before, as I had assumed that the stronger suspension meant that it could carry more weight and withstand heavy use, such as off-roading. However, I had heard of instances where the frames of all types of vehicles, including pickups, jeeps, and trucks, had snapped. For example, the frame of a Spanish couple I had met in Greece recently broke in Georgia. The realization of snapping frames had caused me some concern, but I had managed to let go of a lot of my fears at the time I had been at the Beglika festival. Nonetheless, something was still bothering my mind and I was curious and wanted to see what a smaller cabin would be like. The team at Capra Camper were extremely friendly and we had a great conversation about cabins, off-roading, the van life, Turkey, Germany, and more. They were so kind and gave me some parts I was searching for for free. I had a close look at their cabin and from that point on, I always recommended it to anyone looking for something simple, minimalistic, and lightweight for moderate temperatures at a good price.

But to be honest, from my perspective, the Capra Camper cabin is hardly comparable to the Fernweh-Mobil cabin of Rosinante that I call home. Although both cabins are detachable pickup cabins woth pop-up roofs, they are so different. That showed me once again how incredible Rosinante is in every regard. Since that day, I have met many people with different types of mobile homes: ordinary cars, caravans, jeeps, vans, off-road vans, pickups with other cabins, motorhomes, Landcruisers with pop-up roofs, Defenders with rooftop tents, and off-road trucks. Seeing all these different concepts has only made me love Rosinante even more. It has reassured me that she is perfect for me. Of course, there are things that I need to take care of and changes I would like to make, but overall she is perfect. And if her frame were to snap, I would try to have her fixed. And if that is not possible, I am sure that I would handle it as well.

It’s interesting how a comparison like that can ease my mind and bring me happiness. I mean, in the end, it “doesn’t make sense” to base my confidence and happiness on external factors like this comparison. It can become unstable at any time. But in a way, it feels like that comparison helped me to calm down the part of my mind that was unsatisfied and afraid. It made it possible for me to see things more clearly . Like it lifted a veil of fear and thoughts about a potential future. I think in the end, it helped me to let go.

I rarely drive long distances in a short period of time, but the call of a warm winter was too strong to resist, and so I drove straight to the Mediterranean coast without making any stops. I traveled from Bursa to Bademli and found my first home on the Turkish Mediterranean coast. The next day, I continued further south and on a large sandy beach, I met a wonderful and interesting couple from Germany. We immediately started having engaging and deep conversations. If you’re interested, you can follow them on Instagram.

The next day, I made my way to a beach near Demircili, where I stayed for a couple of days. I enjoyed the warm winter weather, with temperatures around 18 degrees during the day and 12 degrees at night.

Every day, I practiced playing my Cajon, and my playing started to feel natural, flowing, and even a bit groovy at times.

That beach was frequently visited by locals on weekends. They were all so lovely and welcoming. I was invited to a Turkish breakfast and had great conversations with different people. I found it inspiring how open and unafraid these locals were in making connections with others, despite the language barrier. Most of them only spoke Turkish, but that didn’t stop them from reaching out to me and making me feel welcomed. They just did it with ease and it was truly heartwarming.

Hooked by the warm winter, I ventured further south to the peninsula near Marmaris. Many other travelers coming from the east and locals had recommended the area from Bodrum to Antalya, stating that it was one of the most beautiful and warm regions in Turkey. I was excited to explore this area and experience the natural beauty as well as the even warmer temperatures of this region.

The first beach I visited on the peninsula was beautiful, peaceful, and I did some hiking through the hills surrounding it. One day, a German couple arrived at the beach and we had a lot of conversations about various topics. They were considering moving to Hamburg once they returned to Germany. Talking about Hamburg reminded me of the beauty of this city, where I had lived for the past 14 years. It felt good to be able to help them by recommending places to visit and the best spots for car living. One of them was particularly interested in FPV drone flying. Check out his Instagram, his work is incredible and of very high production value.

I took advantage of the Black Friday deals and purchased a large package of music production tutorials and samples. Before that, I had watched free tutorials on YouTube and read free articles from many music production teachers. I was producing music mostly every day for hours and I felt like I wanted to take my music production to the next level. I was curious about how paid courses were structured and what they could offer me. I thought that it might be possible to make money from my music production at some point in the future. I knew that this step and these thoughts could potentially cause some internal conflicts and affect the joy I felt while making music. But I underestimated the impact it would have and soon, it would escalate into something else…

Leaving Bulgaria, struggling with it, finding peace in the magical Strandzha National Park (October 2022)

After our wonderful hut tour, we arrived back in Varna. Artha started a yoga teacher training and I lived the city life in Rosinante right on the beautiful city beach.

Artha wanted to focus on the yoga teacher training and I could understand that very well. If I had been in her shoes, I thought, I’d have wanted to do the same thing. I lived on the city beach of Varna for a week and found a wonderful little beach that felt like a little natural paradise in the city life. Like a little oasis. I enjoyed living on the city beach and Artha and I met up occasionally. As I write this, it feels like at the time I was pushing far away any thoughts or feelings that might prevent me from enjoying that life. It feels like my love for Artha made me feel this way. I wanted to stay by her side. At least for my ego, that seemed to be the most important thing. And as I described in one of the previous posts, I lived that aspect of myself like anything else. I didn’t push Artha too hard, but I still told her how I felt. I never said it had to be how I felt, I just wanted to be pure and honest.

The yoga teacher training was intense and Artha felt like she couldn’t do it wholeheartedly, while at the same time wholeheartedly living the connection between us. She felt that our connection and the dynamic between us were of a very different kind of energy than this profound personal training. I absolutely felt the same way. Although I didn’t like it, we decided that it would be best for her to focus entirely on her training and for me to continue my nature and travel life. I didn’t like this. I felt that once we put some physical distance between us, it was far from certain that we’d see each other again. We both said that we’d like to see each other again when Artha finished her training, but deep down I doubted it. I just felt that she and I carried this brilliant impulse within us to live our respective lives as holistically as possible. Although my romantic love and ego wanted to stay by Artha’s side, I didn’t know if we’d meet again as I continued my journey. It just felt uncertain. Basically, it was like everything in life. Uncertain. Unstable. My ego just wouldn’t accept it. It was only soothed by the fact that the moment I left Varna, Artha and I were firmly convinced that we’d meet again in about two months.

From Varna, I drove to Strandzha National Park. On the way there, I felt torn. I still didn’t like putting distance between me and Artha, but at the same time it felt good and like I was following an inner urge to get going again. To go somewhere without a fixed destination. To go into nature. To stay as long as I want to. To do the things that feel brilliant to me. I remember riding Rosinante very fast down a dirt road that went through a forest, having a lot of fun. At one point, Rosinante even got a little air when she jumped over a small bump and the wheels squealed. Part of me felt free. When I thought about Artha, I felt like I was losing something.

The mountains in Strandzha are wonderful, magical and pure. I parked Rosinante right in the forest and spent all my days outside exploring nature. There were all sorts of things to explore: ancient ritual sites, shrines and all the marvelous and calm beauty of nature.

I felt wonderful, natural and free. And deep inside I suddenly realized that it’s like so many people say: when you let go of a loved one, you experience pure, deep, unconditional love. Not the romantic ego love that is craving for this and that and wants the person you love to make you happy. But the pure love that wants the person you love to be happy. That steps back and throws light into the blurry self-centered perspective of the romantic ego love. For me, there was no doubt that I wanted Artha to be happy and live what felt genuine to her in every moment. And for me, I wanted the same.