About external affirmation, mercy and how I want to do things

At the time of my last post, I had an healthier perspective on social media than before but something still didn’t feel right. Not only about social media, but about more.

I thought a lot about the craving for affirmation and appreciation by others for myseld. Not only regarding social media but regarding me as a whole. I believe that because of our genes as a highly social species, we just want to appeal to others and being liked. One lonely human without it’s herd is just not that strong against all the sabre-toothed tigers etc. and because of this we have to make sure not to be alone. But things have changed a lot since the times of these sabre-toothed friends and it’s not about survival anymore (for most of the times). In the last weeks I just recognized, why I’m feeling pushed and stressed when I’m doing things: it’s mainly because I want to make it good so that others like it. Not all the time, but it seems to be oscillating more or less around what I’m doing. And if it’s not so present, I’m very easy in some kind of an flow regardless what I’m actually doing and this feeling is the best for me.

Regarding the documentation of my journey, the beautiful photos and pictures, my thoughts and feelings: I will just do it the way I want to do it in the moment I’m doing it and not think much about what others will think about it.

What is more my internet roaming doesn’t work anymore after being EU foreign countries for four months and because of that I’ve to use local sim cards and with my Greek sim card, I can’t publish reels on Instagram anymore because this feature and Instagram music are not available in all countries. Right now I don’t want to use an vpn tool for this reason only. So my favourite feature is not available anymore to me. That made me think again about being controlled, helpless and being at the mercy of these big social media platforms when using their tools. And I came to the same conclusion as last year: I don’t want to be completely dependent from these platforms. There will never be full control over stuff I’m having in the internet, but I just want a bit of it.

Because of that and because I want to write more and longer texts, I’ll post some more on this blog again, I think.

Writing this post had been really much fun and it felt free and just right. I’m loving it.

The photo just shows one of these wonderful dancing and ever changing clouds and I thought it just fits to this post.